Worth the read: Matthew Paul Turner's "Spiritual Abuse Must Stop"

"Candle in palm 2" by Cdn in flickr

Matthew Paul Turner wrote a wonderful article titled "Spiritual Abuse Must Stop".

Worth your time to read, comment, and share with a friend. Spiritual Abuse is a subject that church leaders must recognize and confront.

My story: Can't you see I'm dying (Part 3 of life in a Dade City cult)

My Story: Can't you see I'm dying (Part 2) click here

She came to my house at 10:00 that night and told my parents that they had to come to the school for a conference.

In the office, she called me a 'female dog in heat' (a bitch) lusting after the boys and leading them into sin. She said she could see the lust demons coming out of my eyes and that I needed to be whipped to save my soul.

Foolish Parade

As I noted in a previous post a friend from the cult escaped by eloping with her boyfriend.

About two weeks later word came that she and her new husband "went back". It was disheartening to say the least.

Now for the rest of the post you have to imagine the "What the...." bubbles (as Lewis at Commandments of Men so adroitly phrased it) above the heads of non-cult members...

illustration by zappa blamma in flickr

On the Sunday after the sad news came (Mother's Day no less) a family member of mine arrived home to find the whole kit and caboodle of remaining cult members parading the "re-claimed" couple outside their(my relative's) house.

I am sure it was labeled as 'Proclaiming God's Victory to the Wicked' and 'Marching to Show God's Strength'...
I, however, prefer Big Bang's theoretical physicist Sheldon Cooper's explanation:



Tsk, tsk, my dear cult pastor, it just ain't kosher to treat humans as "positional goods"...even if you are full of poofy-haired villainy.

A dear friend (also an ex-member of said cult) e-mailed me this letter in response to the ridiculous parade:

Hi!!!!I heard about "THE PARADE OF IDIOTS" in front of your [relatives] house...
My response was "WHAT? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!"


I have heard [girl's relative] is saying, "THERE IS A LEAK [in the cult] AND HE IS GOING TO FIND IT"...how funny! "Buddy, It's right under your nose. Your "DNA" is the same."

Regarding the "Parade":Only a very low class of people would stoop that low. Too bad they left before the town officials arrived.I'm so glad they are aware of what type of idiots they really are..."THE COMPOUND" is a big joke with all of them and that the leader is just a "mentally challenged old woman" [think Dick Solomon from Third Rock From the Sun mixed with Gaddafi...transform them/it into a woman and... voila! My ex-cult pastor extraordinaire].


I just want you to know that [another dear friend] and I are very proud of you for just trying to help someone that has been classified as having suicidal tendencies. Isn't "LIFE BETTER THAN DEATH"...If you threaten someone to action did you REALLY WIN???? 


PEOPLE, PEOPLE, YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE.


We have heard all that has been said about all of us and WE JUST LAUGH. See, we know the REAL STORY!!! The REAL TRUTH!!!

They do NOT scare us with their little parades.


Actually most people on the street thought that the Jehovah's Witnesses had mounted an assault on San Angela Drive and closed their blinds and locked their doors. TOO FUNNY!!!!


WE ALL JUST SIT BACK AND SMILE.


I give you my permission to post this to anyone and everyone, AJ

I am still laughing about the Jehovah's Witnesses' mounted assault...HOOO!

Suggested reading:

Life Happens While You Are Doing Something Else

by Don Miller
...yeah like mounting foolish parades of positional goods....

And She Walked Back In....But I Hold Onto Hope

photo by jc_syzygy in flickr

As it was my greatest joy to say on the April 29th post that a friend had walked away from the cult it is to my deep sorrow to say that I received news that she went back to the cult.

I hold out hope though. She's had a taste of freedom.

I hold out hope because I left the cult behind.

More than that I have a Father who excels at the impossible.

Please remember her in your prayers.

In light of these events I recommend Lewis Well's post of  the only advice I know to give

And on the lighter side...I am "borrowing" this advice from Eric Pazdziora who borrowed it from RT@ Liturgy: "Don't join dangerous cults -- Practice safe sects!"

SNORT!

Forgive me my nonsense....Post for #Restoreunity

  My post for #restoreunity

Forgive me my nonsense, as I also forgive the nonsense of those that think they talk sense.

~Robert Frost ~

Living in a cult taught me something of unity. A common need to placate a serially angry leader and a perpetually raging God.

God had to be fed constant streams of ceaseless good works and His 'Mouthpiece' perpetual praise for speaking "his" word.

It took team work to keep God and his mouthpiece placated. A complicated system of double speak, ulcers, and covering for family and friends.

We were in God's refining process...or so we were told. This unified us to bear the refining process one more day.

We were told that we must crucify the flesh by sacrificing personal opinions and restraint in questioning the 'Mouthpiece's' decisions.

I finally found this unity to be utter nonsense.

It wasn't unity at all but rather mindless response to the torturous conditioning of an abuser.

Unity is when a Catholic and Protestant can spiritedly debate at work the role of Mary in the present day church and ride home together in peace.
 
Unity I have found to be in the accepting smile of my Protestant friends on Wednesday night Bible study as I say I didn't hear the pastor Sunday...I wasn't in their church.

I discovered unity in the in the understanding eyes of a co-worker when I shared my story...turns out she was in an abusive church too.

Unity stretched over five states as the call went from person to person: "She's out of the cult! They eloped!"

Unity, I believe, is to be found in the shared sufferings of the Body of Christ. Maybe suffering keeps me from considering my nonsense as sense.

Would you unite with me in prayer that an abuser will recognize her nonsense for what it is?

Ease the suffering of others by donating here.

And She Walked Away....

photo by andrewrennie in flickr

Thursday afternoon I experienced the best phone call an ex-cult member can receive: a friend escaped the cult.

She and her fiance made a mad dash for the courthouse to be wed (much to the cult pastor's horror I am sure). As she was forced to live in the cult pastor's house since birth I am sure this took might courage and to say the least, cunning planning on she and her fiance's part.

God bless you, friend, wherever you are and fill you to the full brimming of gladness and joy.

My Two Cents: Have you heard about the jailbreak?

"But it comes down to this: If I am the one in control, then I am in a prison of my own making.

I have come to this place in my life: I either want to let go of my life and let God be in total control, or I want to be in total control myself. Splitting the duties just doesn’t work. “Balance” is not the way. (That is another essay for another day. Just know that the “B” word is not welcome with me.) I can try to earn my way into God’s good graces by doing all of the good and prudent things that Christians are supposed to do, or I can have God’s good Grace simply by receiving it."

~Jail Break~
Internet Monk

“Since when have you not had permission to live any way you like? Even in the prison of legalism, you are free to act and think and do anything you want. It just comes heaped with guilt. And guilt is not a way God speaks to us. Guilt comes from doing something you think you are not supposed to do, whether that goes against tradition or against what you have always been told is wrong or it goes against what religious teachers tell you is wrong. Guilt is based in fear, and fear is not of God. Fear is based on the thought of punishment. And if we are really and truly totally forgiven, then there is no more punishment ahead.”
~Monkshank Redemption~
Internet Monk

"Grace gives you your dignity back. Your dignity is rooted in the identity of Jesus. Jesus came FIRST. He’s not a plan B. He’s not an afterthought. He’s not a result of God saying, ‘Fine. I’ll do this.’ God wanted to ‘do this’. So He created us.


When we sin, we have all of hell trying to get us to believe that we haveruined everything. However, sin illuminates the need for Jesus. Hell wants you to believe that you’re only good enough if you’re good enough. God is trying to get you to see that He created you to need Him, therefore, without grace you are never going to be good enough. It’s not about your failure, it’s about the way this whole thin
g is set up. We’re useless without Him. Would you want it any other way?"
~getting your dignity back~
Serena Woods

"It’s so easy to miss this. Sometimes we even seem to want to miss this. Maybe we prefer things to be more complicated. Maybe we want to feel like we get some reward for our good works. Maybe we want to feel superior to all those sinners who don’t know how to lead a holy life. Maybe we think it isn’t fair that sinners get the same deal as righteous people. But then that’s probably how we felt about salvation before we first received Christ. That’s how we feel when we don’t like the Gospel."
~Just As You Received Christ...~
Eric Pazdziora

Lake {Me} Superior

I am going to start this post by apologizing:This post is the apex of four thought processes train wrecking. Please excuse the messy thought and sentence structure as well as gratuitous allusions.

To start or rather to understand any of this rambling please watch the following clip. The section of 1:30-2:15 is relevant to my point:


The fact is I don’t live in Lake Male Superior. (Though a disturbing amount of men do- see here)

I live in Lake Me Superior (Just call me pond “J”)

Who came up with all the rules in Lake Me Superior? I did. I was influenced by parents, Bible reading and cult living (HA! You thought I was going to say good living didn’t you? Oh come on-just admit it :)

The point is: I made up my rules based on views handed to me by fallible parents and a skewed understanding of God)

Now no diving to conclusions. You might get hurt. I haven’t added a diving board to Lake Me.

There are moral absolutes. Ten of ‘em in Exodus. I haven't kept all of them all of the time-have you?

There AREN’T, however, me absolutes. Me absolutes used to say that all women who wore pants were sinning. Add a little makeup to that if you will you ungodly huzzy!

My absolute authority on this: A cult pastor. (Funny that it was okay though to steal people’s life savings. Just don’t wear pants and make up while you do it!)

My point: I am fallible. I do not make the rules. I am not (SNICKER!) a judgment stone. I list more toward the natural disaster zone.

Serena Woods describes it brilliantly:

People sit on their throne of judgement with their scepter of wisdom petting their bobble head lion of Judah and consider the shortcomings of others in order to determine their eternal position. The disease of the religious insider is the complacent familiarity with the profound evidence, turning the sovereign power of God (which should scare the skin off of us) into pathetic beliefs based on ‘vain imaginings, foolish reasoning, and stupid speculations.’ They would much rather serve a god who sits on their mantel, over seeing their living room lives with stoic approval. They don’t hear God speaking any more, their ‘minds have been darkened’, so they feel compelled to speak for Him.

I can quote because I am guilty. I have been a god with stoic approval for rule-abiders. As long as they wore skirts.

No more stoic allowed here and I am crushing my bobble-head doll.

The fact is that worshipping at the temple of my goodness (usefulness, godliness) is so much easier than working on my relationship with God

Relationships are hard. They are great one morning and boom the next morning it is a cat of a different color.

There is hurt, pain, and misunderstanding. And tomorrow there will just be more of the same.

Relationships require staying. If you stay through tomorrow's pain there might be next week's reconciliation.

Joy and laughter.

So here cometh the apex of my thought train wreck:

I realized I am not going to change the world with my blog. I am not even going to alert people to a destructive church in Dade City.

More often than not I find myself praying for the twisted person that abused my spirituality for her own gain. I pray she find peace.

I still struggle. I still have days of anger and nights of repenting for hatred.

But I pray. And breath. As Ann Voskamp said:

Just breathe.


And I think of it again, how it really is, the very name of God, YHWH, “is the sound of breathing.


The holiest name in the world, the Name of Creator, is the sound of your own breathing.”

I will breathe my prayers for healing and hope.

I am not going to read my google analytics and tie my self-worth to it. Thanks Jon!

This is all part of me walking away from the pain of the Cult Next Door (Experience not blog).

And totally unrelated topic :)...I heard in various places that Rob Bell is writing that the whole world is going to heaven and that Ann Voskamp has a book about what?!?! (See Elizabeth Esther's humorous explanation.)

Their influence has lead commenter KatR to hilarious determination:

I’m going to write a book where I claim that God lets non-Christians into heaven. And then has metaphorical sex with them. It’s going to be called “Love Wins A Thousand Gifts”. Please make sure that John Piper knows immediately, cause it’s all about the benjamins, baby.

SNICKER!!!! Thank you Elizabeth and KatR for putting things into perspective.

Might I humbly say that we should rejoice that a sister in Christ has allowed others to worship with her?
Or that a pastor is willing to explore John 3:16? Why does hell have to be the sell point?
 ^16-18"This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn't go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again. Anyone who trusts in him is acquitted; anyone who refuses to trust him has long since been under the death sentence without knowing it. And why? Because of that person's failure to believe in the one-of-a-kind Son of God when introduced to him. (John 3:16, The Message)

Ride on Rob Bell and Ann Voskamp.

Very respectfully: Maybe some other folks need to come out of Lake {ME} Superior?

I am putting my accusatory finger to rest and sing along with Anna Nalick:

/

Why not take a moment and share at Elizabeth Esther's Blog party?

I'm not who I was by Brandon Heath

A little Friday something for all my bloggy friends...so glad I'm not who I was :)

Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month

Lisa Bertolini of Soul Liberty Faith has shared an inspirational post on Hillary McFarland's blog Quivering Daughters titled Behind Spiritual Abuse Awareness Month.

Listed below are posts I found inspirational as well as my own story.

Please take the opportunity to share your own story in the Mr. Linky widget.

I can't go to church anymore by Elizabeth Esther

Spiritual Abuse and the Gospel by Hillary McFarland

I Have a Sign: Answering Spiritual Abusers... by Eric Pazdziora

I See Dead People by Tales From the Crypt


The Manipulative Power of Peace by Lewis Wells

Just Be by Serena Woods

Pimps in the Pasture by The Secret Life of a Bishop's Wife

Works-Righteousness by Any Other Name... by imonk

My Story:
Can't You See That I Am Dying?

Check The Spirits...And Not Just At The Door!

01StevenK in photobucket

 ¹Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. (1 John 4:1, King James Version)
 ¹ My dear friends, don't believe everything you hear. Carefully weigh and examine what people tell you. Not everyone who talks about God comes from God. There are a lot of lying preachers loose in the world. (1 John 4:1, The Message)

Pastor Gene Jennings at True North Church preached last Sunday on hearing the voice of God. (Just to be clear: this is my wonderful new very safe church...not the spooky old church)

Pastor Jennings presented the litmus test to know if the "voice" (thoughts, impressions,other's words) is of God:

• agrees with Scripture
• makes one's actions more Christ-like
• is confirmed by other believers
• gives a sense of peace

He noted that if the "voice" directs away from the Scriptures it is false.

Pastor Jennings, I wish I believed that truth eleven years ago...heck make that twenty years ago. (Though as a twelve year old I'm not sure how I could have left the cult behind...well, anyhoo)

The cult leader of a Dade City church told a congregant to leave his wife as she was not attending the cult. Let's see...hmm...didn't Jesus say:

 ^5-9Jesus said, "Moses wrote this command only as a concession to your hardhearted ways. In the original creation, God made male and female to be together. Because of this, a man leaves father and mother, and in marriage he becomes one flesh with a woman—no longer two individuals, but forming a new unity. Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate his art by cutting them apart." (Mark 10:5, The Message)

She told another congregant that she should not care for her ailing mother. She went so far as to quote:

²⁰Jesus was curt: "Are you ready to rough it? We're not staying in the best inns, you know."
 ²¹Another follower said, "Master, excuse me for a couple of days, please. I have my father's funeral to take care of."
 ²²Jesus refused. "First things first. Your business is life, not death. Follow me. Pursue life." (Matthew 8:20-22, The Message)

 I'm not a scholar so I don't understand why Christ was telling the man not to attend his father's funeral. What I do understand is that she put herself in the place of Christ by saying that the adult child should give more loyalty to the church (a.k.a her) than to a biological mother.
Paul said:

 ^3-8 Tell these things to the people so that they will do the right thing in their extended family. Anyone who neglects to care for family members in need repudiates the faith. That's worse than refusing to believe in the first place. (1 Timothy 5:3, The Message)

She instructed church members to shun young children as they were "under an evil influence". We are talking six, seven, eight year olds. Can you imagine the devastating effect this had on the child?

I failed and made wrong decisions that hurt others while in the Dade City cult. One thing I did do right and I am fiercely glad and yes, PROUD of was refusing to ignore a child. I was yelled at over the pulpit and called proud and a promoter of rebellion. After the service I confronted the pastor and told her why I refused to "shun" a child. I told her that there is a Scripture that actually suggests suicide:

 ¹Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offences will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come!
 ²It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.
 ³Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. (Luke 17:1-3, King James Version)

I quoted the King James as any other version was 'worldly'.

Here is how the 'worldly' version, The Message, reads:

 ^1-2He said to his disciples, "Hard trials and temptations are bound to come, but too bad for whoever brings them on! Better to wear a millstone necklace and take a swim in the deep blue sea than give even one of these dear little ones a hard time!
 ^3-4"Be alert. If you see your friend going wrong, correct him. If he responds, forgive him. Even if it's personal against you and repeated seven times through the day, and seven times he says, 'I'm sorry, I won't do it again,' forgive him." (Luke 17:1-3, The Message)

Ohhhhh! So we're supposed to forgive! It's not our job to enforce a repentant spirit....hmmmm! Jesus says it is better to end your life than to give a little one a hard time... Sounds like her theology wasn't from God!

Thankfully my family and I finally "tested" her spirit and let tell you...it ain't from God, friend.

And we got the hell out of that church-or rather, we left the hell of that church behind.

edwardo37 in photobucket

I beg you, reader, test the spirit. Test the words. Test the pastor.

There are zombie pastors out there my friend and they want your brain. 

^1-6 God's Message came to me: "Son of man, prophesy against the shepherd-leaders of Israel. Yes, prophesy! Tell those shepherds, 'God, the Master, says: Doom to you shepherds of Israel, feeding your own mouths! Aren't shepherds supposed to feed sheep? You drink the milk, you make clothes from the wool, you roast the lambs, but you don't feed the sheep. You don't build up the weak ones, don't heal the sick, don't doctor the injured, don't go after the strays, don't look for the lost. You bully and badger them. And now they're scattered every which way because there was no shepherd—scattered and easy pickings for wolves and coyotes. Scattered—my sheep!—exposed and vulnerable across mountains and hills. My sheep scattered all over the world, and no one out looking for them! (Ezekiel 34:1-3, The Message)

 ¹⁵ The gullible believe anything they're told;
   the prudent sift and weigh every word. (Proverbs 14:15, The Message)

On a more positive note...The series "Hear God Speak" will be available for listening on the True North website. Absolutely worth your listening time. As stated above I wish I had heard this sermon twenty years ago. Many thanks to Pastor Steve and Gene for speaking on the subject.

Hazing: The Fraternity Tatics of Spiritual Abusers

In 1978, Alfred University student Chuck Stenzel decided to join the fraternity Klan Alpine. To become one of the 'brethren',Chuck was given a bottle of wine, pint of whiskey and six pack of beer, locked in the trunk of a car with other pledges, and left in nine degree temperature.When the alcohol was finished, the trunk would be opened.

When the trunk was opened, Chuck was unconscious. He died later that night.

The fraternity denied responsibility of his death.

His mother Eileen determined to find the truth. Klan Alpine members, however, were reluctant to speak out of the 'code of silence' employed by the fraternity.Overcoming members' reluctance to speak out, Eileen eventually pieced together the story of Chuck's last day and determined to fight the oppressive tactics of fraternity hazing.

As I read the story, I was shocked at the loyalty of the frat members. They would rather that an abusive system live on to kill someone else rather than speak the truth of Chuck's death. However, at this point, I had an "Eureka!" moment. Hadn't I myself been part and parcel of a group who employed abuse and mind-controlling techniques similar to those of a fraternity?Hadn't I myself protected a Dade City church 'fraternity' with years of silence?

My Two Cents on Good Reading (and Listening!)

I'm the chick with the broken heart by Elizabeth Esther

Sheep Story by Eric Pazdziora

8 Techniques For Thought Control by My Teen Mania Experience

Encouragement by Darcy's Heart Stirrings

Lamentations 3:19

Building an Altar by Lewis Wells

I See Dead People by Meg and Burnie

Michael W Smith sings about church abuse

Don't forget to share your two cents!

photos by davidfaboyd and magistar in photobucket

Share Two Cents

Though I won't be posting regularly after October 31st I do want to host a monthly "share fest".

Share your two cents! Share two of your recent posts or mix and match it with a favorite post you've read. Make it more fun by alerting your readers of the chance to share. Be sure to share a comment explaining why you chose the two posts.

I am sharing my post "Some Days It's Just a Monster Mash" in the spirit of Halloween as well as Elizabeth Esther's "I'm the Chick With the Broken Heart".
Here is Mr. Linky...so give us your two cents!


I have discovered wonderful authors from Elizabeth Esther and Stuff Christians Like respective blog parties- Thanks for hosting, Elizabeth and Jon!

Thanks for sharing! Your two cents are important!

In giving you are throwing a bridge across the chasm of your solitude. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Wisdom of the Sands, translated from French by Stuart Gilbert

Now I Thrive

Another dear family member shares their account of life in the Dade City church:

Where does a person begin to tell about the mental abuse? I’ll just tell the truth.

Friday night youth meetings did last for hours - and, [name with held] did in fact tell us not to let the Pastor know how long she kept us in youth meeting. These meetings were not times of fellowship, sharing or “God moving,” but more {name with held] yelling at us and chewing us out, telling us how we were not measuring up to God’s standards (as she defined them).

I remember reading my Bible on my own, and coming to a saving knowledge and a loving relationship with Jesus during this time, understanding my life’s purpose to become more and more Christ-like. This was definitely not the message being preached on Friday nights. It was made clear to all of us that no matter what we did, we would never be good enough – we would always be a disappointment to God, unless we surrendered our lives to her direction, without question. This was also the time [name with held] started to exert control over behavior. We were shown how to shun kids that didn’t meet her expectations, and other social pressures were brought to bear. Many of those kids grew up to be very good at shunning at her command.

Without going into all the gruesome details, [name with held] continued to “work” with the youth. When the Pastor passed away from an illness in the late 80’s, she began to work to take control over the church, undermining the successor the Pastor had chosen. By about 1990, [name with held] had become head pastor, and church began its dissent into becoming a cult. Once she had control of the church, she began working on individuals.

Blinded By False Love

This account was written by a very dear friend of mine.

To my eternal consternation and regret I was the one that invited she and her sister to the Dade City church, thereby inducing her in the cult.

There are so many decision and words I would take back if I had the chance.

Inviting her to attend the cult with me is the action I wish most desperately to take back.

Thankfully she is still my friend and has never made me feel guilty or responsible for introducing her into this life of horror.

I am proud to say she thrives, a fulfilled woman unshackled by her past.

God bless you, Friend.

My Sister and I entered "the Cult" life when I was 12 and she was 10 when our parents enrolled us into what seems a very innocent church/school.  

Unbeknown to my parents this was a very big mistake. They were quite impressed by the warm greeting they received from the teacher and principal , even some of the church members greeted us with extreme courtesy.

I remember thinking where were all the kids , not realizing that "the church kids" I were my age, but were dressed and looked as if they were in there 20's and 30's.

The girls wore dresses and skirts that I had seen at the "old lady " departments in Dillard's and Bealls.

The boys were wearing dress coats and old style pants that I had seen on older men of their 50's.I couldn't even imagine conforming to wearing those clothes and styling my hair the way they did.

Well soon after we starting school, I was immersed into how kind I was treated and gifts started to get laid down at my feet. I was honored with "people person" and varies other awards. I couldn't help but think WOW they must really think I'm special and I just ate it up ! I began staying after school more and helping around the church property with the "church kids". Slowly I fell into a pit of FALSE LOVE.

Some Days It's Just a Monster Mash

In an interview with Focus on the Family author Frank Peretti explained his motivation for writing about monsters. As a child he had a medical condition which turned his tongue an oozing black.

As children are often the cruelest beings on the planet, Peretti suffered through taunts of being a “monster”. Choosing the positive aspect of a bad situation, he decided to see monsters as “cool” and himself as special in being associated with them.

This post is in celebration of choosing the positive, and yes, even the humorous aspect of feeling like a freak.

After living in a fundamental cult for twenty plus years, I escaped into what I thought would be stress-free living. I survived hell on earth- now it was time to lay back and relax, right?

That might be right for some. And if you are part of that some, congratulations- you have the good life.

Happiness is a Journey

This account is from a dear family member who also attended the abusive church:

I must say, this is a very difficult situation for me because I still have family that I love dearly, still in this compound. My mother and sister are still held captive there by a force that they can not even see for themselves. They will read this and will be very upset with me, and I am sure that they will make sure it gets back to me that they are not by any means being held captive or feel they have to stay, but the truth is, I have been there and I know that there are times they feel insecure about the environment in which they exist, we all did at some point and time, but because of the deep-set mind control, you ignore those feelings and continue your mere existence in the world that has been “created” for you. So, mom and sis, I do this because I love you!

My Story: Can't You See I'm Dying?

To start the beginning of the end of the blog I am re-posting the personal accounts of life in an abusive Dade City church.

This is my story:

I was part of a Tampa/Dade City church for twenty-four years. If I sat at this computer for a year and typed continuously, I couldn't begin to record the horror perpetrated on me and those I love.

At the same time, I have experienced God's amazing deliverance from destructive cult and the amazing concern from those who walked with me as I left behind a spiritually-abusive hell.

My history begins with my parents attending the church when I was pre-school age.

The pastor at the time tried to 'sever ties' with the movement called the 'Body'; being a young child, I didn't understand what this meant.

The Journey From The Cult

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

Still round the corner there may wait
A new road or a secret gate,
And though I oft have passed them by,
A day will come at last when I
Shall take the hidden paths that run
West of the Moon, East of the Sun.
~J.R.R. Tolkien~